“Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colours. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.” ― Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full of Sky
After moping and asking myself hundreds of questions about my relationship, I am at peace. I always thought peace would come from getting answers but it didn’t. It comes with knowing you have done your best and acknowledging that there are some answers you will never get.

Now on to the good stuff…..

I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that I would brave a few blind dates. Since then I have discovered two things. 1. I’m a chicken. 2. It’s possible to lose interest before you meet someone.

My co worker’s fiancee was determined to hook me up with a guy from her office. Apparently he and I are from the same country, he’s an engineer and and he’s single. I figured “whats the worst that could happen. He didn’t sound too bad on paper.” *shrugs*

She gave him my number on Monday. He called immediately #sigh. I don’t know how I feel about that. Part of me says over-eager, the other part says don’t be so judgemental. So I ignored that. Then he just didn’t get off the phone. He just went on and on and on. He is a stranger. We know next to nothing about each other. (please note the exasperated tone) Do I really have to say a long phone call is a bad idea. What with the awkward silences and starting to speak at the same time etc. Eventually he said goodbye. Thank goodness….then he started chatting…..and never stopped.

By Tuesday afternoon I knew his drink of preference and what his lounge looks like. Did I mention he sends random photos? Still I figured different strokes. Nerves make us all do weird things. I was nervous too. Then he demanded I meet him on Tuesday. Yes, he demanded. Clearly he has no idea who he is dealing with. I politely said “no” and suggested Friday instead. I will give him an A for persistence. I confess I was starting to feel slightly irritated by the time he understood I have a hectic sport and work schedule and I don’t do social get-togethers mid week. At this point in our interaction a ‘no’ should really have been sufficient. But still I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

Then he moved on to dropping hints about how I sound a tad snobbish and twenty something isn’t too old and I must be a white person because I like rock music. Now he was firmly in the orange zone. But still, orange is a warning not a red light.

Then he found out I’m a lawyer and he said that was great because he had an agreement he wanted me to look over for him when we met for coffee. #sigh #reddish orange light. I politely replied my department has a secretary and if he would like to discuss work he can call her and make an appointment and she will send him an engagement letter outlining the fee structure. I also pointed out we serve our clients coffee during meetings so he can kill 2 birds with one stone. He laughed and he dropped the subject.

Then he demanded I send photos of myself. I hardly know him so I politely said no. This time he just wouldn’t take no for an answer. The light went bright red when after 10 messages asking for a photo I said I’m really getting impatient and he replied “me too. just send the photo.”

The nerve. On to the next one.

“Life is a blank canvas, and you need to throw all the paint on it you can.”
Danny Kaye