Since my breakup, my eyes have been opened in all manner of ways. I realised that while I was dating, I hardly cultivated relationships with girlfriends. Instead, I focused on work, love and sport. It didnt help at all that when I first moved to this city, it was with the boyfriend. He was always my comfortzone and I hardly saw the need to step too far out of it. I made a few friends but none I felt I really connected with. Its very likely that the reason is I wasn’t trying too hard.
Finding myself with a sudden gap between work and sport, I decided to cultivate friendships. It’s the best thing I have ever done for myself. I found that good conversation with clever women is golden. With the advent of social networks, people have forgotten how to to simply talk. How to be witty. How to debate. How to sit and chat until the sun comes up. In the past couple of weeks I have met women who can do just that. Our little group consists of two lawyers, one doctor and one magazine editor (and usually a couple of other people). We have very little in common. Two of us are married and the others are single. With no TV, smartphones or music, there is never a dull moment. All we need is an endless supply of wine and the evening is perfect.
I have nothing against social networks. I indulge all the time (please note I’m blogging). I just feel that meeting your friends and looking at your phone the whole time defeats the purpose. I chat to a woman on one of these social networks whom I have never met. She has me in fits of laughter everytime we chat. She says the most vulgar things in such clever ways that she draws you in instead of putting you off. Granted, she can be a bit much, but the woman’s brain is amazing. She is a die hard cricket fan and she keeps the tweeting world entertained with her quips whilst watching matches. What amuses me the most (and ticks her off completely) is that after a few men realised she is a girl, they sent her private messages asking if shes gay because women are generally not into sport #sigh.
It’s so sad that the price of technology has been giving up the most basic social skills. While making friends I have encountered a few men who are interested in a little more than friendship and conversation. Admittedly I’m human, and I miss having sex but my greatest sexual organ is my brain. If there is no stimulation there, there is no stimulation anywhere else. Because sex is not a big deal anymore (I’m not judging), people have forgotten how to play the game. Perhaps I’m old fashioned or I have been out of the game too long, but I would like to have sex with a person who can flirt using real and complete words and who doesnt have a social network acronym for everything ttyl, wud, brb, etc….. its exhausting.