I often say that differences in culture make life an ongoing comedy show for me. I originally come from an extremely conservative country. So conservative in fact that a girl who is so liberal as to ask a man out risks being considered a slut. If you fall pregnant then you and your baby daddy are getting married. It’s not negotiable. Yes, its that bad. Yes, they have heard of constitutional rights. And no, they don’t care. You might be interested in knowing that over there, the Constitution doesn’t rank any higher than any other form of law and is not worth the paper its written on.

I have since moved to what many consider a very liberal African country. Most of Africa considers this country far too liberal for its own cultural good. Larger political and social issues aside, I have found myself single in a liberal country. This has complicated my life to no end. I simply don’t know how to behave!

Where I come from girls do NOT approach guys. NEVER. So you have to learn to indicate interest without actually placing your dignity on the line. The guy must do all the work. In fact, we do silly things like say no when you really want to say yes, just to see how far he will go for your attention. The upside to this is when a guy from my country likes you, he will move a mountain to impress you….. or at least a small hill. How he behaves after he has you is another matter entirely.

Here, women do whatever they like. If they like a guy, they will call him. People have babies out of wedlock left, right and centre. Behaviour that would render a person a social pariah where I come from, is perfectly normal and acceptable here. Not surprisingly, the guys here also don’t try too hard.

The complication now is that I have only ever dated men from my own country. They, as all men do, have their shortcomings but with them, I knew the rules. I knew how to play the game. Now I’m in situation where I have no aversion to dating guys from anywhere in the world or any race but I haven’t a cooking clue how.

So far its been hilariously disastrous. I’m still too embarrassed to tell some of the stories but give me a week or two to start laughing at myself and I will share.

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